One day while perusing Pinterest (Michael says that's where originality goes to die), I came across this:
I would have provided a reference link, but none seem to exist anymore.
As it just sew happens (see what I did there? Its a sewing table!), I had something at my disposal that has been looking for a job for a VERY long time....
I'm not really sure why this is the angle of the ONLY picture that I have of it. But imagine that the wooden piece is the top and the metal plate is at the bottom.
So after ripping this thing to pieces and attaching a wooden top, I had a NEW sewing machine! It looks amazing!
NOW, I just need to find something to sew! Which, if I take a look at my list of things to do, shouldn't be too hard.